Terminating Traffic Trouble

By Angie

Picture this: you go to school one day and notice something... different. There are speed limits, parking lots, and signs warning of 'Merging Traffic.'

Well thats what's happened at G.B.S! Teachers have put yellow tape on the ceiling in a strait line to represent road lines. Kids at G.B.S may earn allot of paws prints just by staying to the right of the hallways and focusing on their destination. An anonymous source said, "I was walking on the wrong side of the hallway at first, then I saw a teacher and quickly jumped to the other side. She gave me a paw print for correcting my actions!"

Many kids are seeing the advantages of these perky traffic sings. However, there are a select few who don't see the point. "It's stupid and it's not gonna last," said one student after seeing a sing that read, 'Speed limit walk.' Another said, "I could live without it" Yet another anonymous student said, "Uh, I guess it's kind of okay."

This may sound crazy, but believe it or not the new system is actually working. There are less jams in the hallway, and sources have reported seeing an older student revving up the engine of an invisible Ferrari. Many have spotted practicing parallel parking in front of there classrooms as well. The majority of the road signs say, 'Stay to the right.' The teachers have even come up with a catchy jingle to the tune of 'The Addams Family' theme music.

In addition to the traffic sings plastering the walls of every hallway, there have also been teachers wielding traffic signs on wooden poles saying 'stay to the right!' on one side and on there other 'slow down!' The GBS bobcat actually gave us a reminder over the daily announcements one morning, though nobody knows the bobcats current whereabouts.

Despite many uh... passionate opinions regarding our new 'road' perhaps this will be a long-term system. We can only wait and see.

Personally, I think the sings should be more road-oriented. Maybe we could manage some cardboard stop lights or signs that say 'yield to incoming traffic.' To tell the truth, nobody sees signs in real life that say 'stay to the right' because unless you're from London that shouldn't be an issue. But until that sets in, the signs can stay the way they are, and once everyone knows the hallway expectations, thats when we get creative. Again this is just my opinion.

Do you have an opinion? Ideas for new signs? Report on the old hallway attitude vs. the new? Please comment on this article!!!